| The challenge of the 'empty nest' |
 Next year, there’s a likelihood that my eldest son will leave home to go to university. And I know that, if the time comes, I’ll have to get used to him not being around so much. After many years of investing in bringing up children, the ‘empty nest’ is often a challenging time for couples, who need to adjust their step and find new ways to reconnect. I was surprised, therefore, to come across some recent research from the University of California, which seems to undermine much of the conventional wisdom that couples are left feeling bereft once their children leave home. The researchers studied a group of women over a period of 18 years, and instead found a marked increase in the happiness of their marriages once the children had left home. The researchers believe this may be helped by the wider range of opportunities that are available once women are no longer focussed on the role of raising children. Denise Knowles, a senior counsellor at Relate, the relationship advice service, said: “For many couples it is a difficult time. The glue disappears and the cracks that are already there can open wide. But for those who have remained strong, they can re- establish themselves as a shared couple. A lot of women absolutely love this, although they also miss their children. They think, ‘Now there’s a little time for me’.” Children leaving home can undoubtedly be a challenging time for couples. Here are 5 tips for keeping your marriage strong: • Make time for each other • Talk and listen about things that matter • Resolve conflict and be quick to forgive • Keep sex alive • Have fun together – go back to doing the things you enjoyed when you first met, or discover new things By Katherine Hill: Going off to College Excited, daunted and full of questions – that how author Michael Volland felt before heading off to university for the first time. Despite the hundreds of distractions, university life can be a radical time when young people can get to know God in a deep and amazing new way. The memory is still so vivid for Michael that he had no problems in recalling all the questions that he faced. So he’s written a booklet based on Bible verses to help meet the challenges and find some answers. Published by the Bible Reading Fellowship, priced at £1.99. ‘Going to College’ is available from www.brf.org.uk or bookshops. |
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