| Winning them back |
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Ian White finds out how God gave an underworld debt-collector a new purpose in life – helping victims of the sex trade  in ThailandOnce his mission was to inflict pain on bad debtors in the drugs underworld. Now it’s to rescue children sold into prostitution in Thailand. Streetwise Paul Darbinson, 41, who would freely wield a baseball bat on his victims without batting an eyelid, now helps youngsters escape from their destructive lifestyle, often enforced on them as a way of paying off family debts. Paul is the founder of Hand in Hand Ministries, a UK charity operating in the heart of Bangkok. He describes himself as “an uneducated guy with a history of being abused and bullied”. “I left home at 14 when I discovered my ‘father’ wasn’t my actual dad and ended up on the streets, where again I was abused.  “I always believed in God but struggled to understand why I was put in the world and why I went through things. But then I had a real God encounter and things have never been the same.” Paul finally quit his debt-collecting when suddenly struck with compassion for an intended target in London. He was then discovered collapsed in an alley in Soho with a load of drugs by a minister he’d previously encountered. After a period working in a Tanzanian orphanage, Paul moved to Australia, where he met Dutch missionaries. Through them he went to Thailand, and it was there he encountered the bar girls whose stories impacted him so deeply that the vision for Hand in Hand was born. And he’s certainly travelled a long way since his misspent youth. Paul will never forget his first year in Thailand. He recalls: “It was 2004, the year of the Tsunami, and I remember travelling back to Phuket on Boxing Day on the bus. I’m glad it was an hour late, otherwise I might have been on the sea front myself. I did lose some friends but thankfully many of those missing were finally found.” He hired a bus to drive some of the girls, suddenly with no tourist places to work, back home himself in what proved a five-day tiring and emotional epic. The trauma had its effect on the team, and when a group went to Cambodia to renew visas many departed for good. But Paul remained firmly committed to the ongoing work of rescuing girls from abuse. He discovered thousands were forced to sell themselves in bars and massage parlours as it was the only work available in the tourist areas and small towns. He says, “They may appear to smile and show affection, but one just has to look into their eyes to see the hopelessness that resides there and the stark absence of joy and any type of peace. “Girls not able to find clients by the end of the night have to sleep on the floor of a small room – up to 20 at a time – which again they have to pay for. “Some are sold into the trade to pay off debts. So many working the bars have the sole purpose of providing for their families, who often have no idea what they are actually doing. “Most come from small rural towns and villages and tell their families they have good jobs in shops or hotels. But realistically the vast majority have little or no education and work is impossible to find.” Initially Paul’s mission in Phuket was to befriend the locals and get to know their needs. The team handed out condoms and sexual health information. They also paid for meals, always careful not to give any wrong impressions. Over time they realised many actually desperately welcomed help to escape their soul- destroying lives. Paul says: “This is by no means a lifestyle choice. These girls ultimately pay the huge price of abuse, isolation and rejection.” Some get hooked on drugs to deal with the pain, he says, and many even commit suicide. “Our ministry is to help these girls, rescuing children and trying to reunite families or at least to find safe houses for them to live in. We help girls out of prostitution and into education or to find alternative jobs.” Financial assistance is also given until suitable employment is found. Paul concludes: “People don’t care how much you know, until they know how much you care.” |
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